


Insomnia

by dreaminginside



Category: Topp Dogg, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Drabble, Established Relationship, Introspection, M/M, Words upon words upon words, dumb babies in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-30
Updated: 2013-11-30
Packaged: 2018-01-03 00:58:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1063775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreaminginside/pseuds/dreaminginside
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hyosang spends too much time thinking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Insomnia

**Author's Note:**

> For Pro and Angela because this seems to happen a lot

Hyosang spends too much time thinking.

There’s a small space of the night in which he knows he should be sleeping, moon high in the sky and red letters on his clock ticking down the few hours of rest that he has. He should be asleep, but he isn’t, sat up against a creaky wooden headboard and tapping a chromatic scale out on his knee.

It’s like this every night.

He stays up and lets the wheels of his mind roll over the future, possibilities, too many lyrical rhythms that are waiting to be let out. Tastes the familiar sting of regrets in the past on his tongue and grimaces as he feels the dark lines beneath his eyes growing darker and deeper with each passing thought in his mind. He imagines holding a cigarette of empty feelings in his hand and tapping the ash out on the edge of window, watching imaginary smoke fall to the bottom of the alley below. He’s rather mesmerized by all of it, until the body next to his shifts.

Hyosang wonders how Seokjin can sleep so soundly.

He pulls his knees up a bit closer to himself and thinks of how many people would kill to be in his position, the thought bringing a smile to his face. He absentmindedly brushes the hair from Seokjin’s face as his thoughts turn to the other boy, barely able to glean out the soft features of his face in the low light.

Seokjin has the kind of face that men would have gone to war for, he muses, the type that makes men lose their reason.

“I certainly lost mine,” He mumbles to himself, finding a sort of relaxation in running his hand through the errant strands of Seokjin’s color damaged hair, close enough to see the small imperfections that Seokjin doesn’t allow many to see. He feels his eyes begin to droop and lets himself slump down further, laughing slightly that Seokjin still has this effect on him, even after all these years. “Wouldn’t I have left already, if it weren’t for you?”

Hyosang doesn’t really expect an answer as he pulls the blankets back up and slips down the headboard, bidding his ever noisy mind goodnight for once as he gives up on his insomniac manners to attempt at closing his eyes. They snap right back open at the sound of Seokjin’s voice, though, the other boy’s eyes remaining closed even as Hyosang can see the knit of his eyebrows in frustration, biting his lip because he knows that look.

“Go to sleep,” Seokjin murmurs, reaching out to pull Hyosang the rest of the way to laying down, eyes slowly blinking open and cutting through Hyosang. “Stop thinking about things that could be or would be, right now it is what it is. It’ll get better.”

Hyosang sighs noncommittally but wraps an arm around Seokjin’s shoulders in a half hug, mostly as an excuse to feel Seokjin’s skin against his, something to keep him grounded. Seokjin twines his other hand with Hyosang and turns his head so that his lips brush the Hyosang’s bare shoulder as he speaks, and Hyosang can feel the gooseflesh rising.

“Don’t leave me,” It’s a thought left hanging between them, a sigh from Seokjin’s lips. Hyosang swallows hard and doesn’t answer as Jin moves closer, tangling their legs together, coming close enough that Hyosang can feel his breath on his neck. His head feels cloudy, and he thinks that he would be one of those to go to war for Seokjin if that is what he asked of him. 

“I don’t think I can,” Is what he settles on, because it’s all that feels true in the jumble of his late night thoughts. It’s something that he reasons true, because no matter how far he could possibly go, no matter what he could possibly do, he doesn’t think he could ever really leave behind Seokjin. It isn’t really in Seokjin’s nature to be left behind anyway. “It’s a promise, just go back to sleep.”

Seokjin hums noncommittally and Hyosang is left alone again within his head, sorting through a mess of thoughts that seem to become even more irreparably tangled with every conversation with Seokjin lately.

He makes a decision as he falls into a dark dreamless sleep, a certain relief resonating in his chest as the few hours of sleep pass and Seokjin wakes him with a kiss to the corners of his eyes, smiling like he knows what Hyosang has in mind.

Hyosang simply smiles at the unasked question, and locks away his thoughts, hoping this regret won’t plague him as well during his next bout of insomnia.

...

There is a text on Hyosang’s phone almost immediately after he talks to their CEO, and Hyosang feels deep fear in his heart that only seeing Seokjin’s name on his phone after he has done something incredibly questionable really causes. It reads two simple words, and Hyosang forgets his fear in favor of a grin. He hopes this means that Seokjin isn’t too mad at him.

_don’t forget_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! All of anything is appreciated :)


End file.
